How Do You Show Up for Yourself?

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to show up for yourself. For years, I struggled to show up for myself because I was entrenched in doing what I thought I “should” do.

I abandoned my sense of self in an effort to mould myself into someone who could cope with a situation that was tearing me apart.

On a surface level, it seemed as though I was engaging in self-care. I would take bubble baths, exercise, and eat nourishing meals. I made time for socializing, and I continued to go to therapy.

But while those are all good examples of what self-care can look like, it wasn’t enough.

I was failing to show up for myself on such a fundamental level that my mental health suffered. By forcing myself to stay in a job that sucked the joy out of even the best moments of my life, I damaged the trust I should have had in myself.

I knew something was wrong, but instead of trusting that I could make the best decision for myself, I ignored what my intuition was trying to tell me.

Today, I want to talk about what it means to show up for yourself and share strategies I’ve learned that have allowed me to start authentically showing up for myself.

What does it mean to show up for yourself?

Showing up for yourself is all about prioritizing your own needs. This includes your practical, physical, emotional, and spiritual needs.

We spend so much of our lives on autopilot that it can become difficult to put ourselves first.

Showing up for yourself means taking a break from the mundane, day-to-day tasks to be mindful and present. This allows you to nurture yourself in ways that might not be possible without mindfulness and presence.

Showing up for yourself means not abandoning yourself in favour of taking care of others’ needs. It means being an ally and a friend to yourself and looking out for your best interests.

How to show up for yourself

On the surface, showing up for yourself can certainly include engaging in self-care activities like exercise and therapy. But there’s only so much that self-care activities can do when we’re failing to show up for ourselves in more fundamental ways.

Recognize unhelpful self-talk

It’s easy to get caught up in the negative and unhelpful self-talk that pops up throughout the day. Negative self-talk is a common response to negative experiences, but instead of helping, it fuels the negativity.

In contrast, constructive self-talk enables us to see that while we may be going through a difficult situation, we have the knowledge and the skills to learn from it and move past it.

Recognizing negative self-talk and switching it to constructive self-talk takes a lot of practice and self-awareness, but it can be an amazing way to help ourselves get through challenging times.

Practice self-compassion

I know I’m not alone in the fact that I would never dream of saying some of the things I say to myself to a loved one.

Self-compassion is all about showing ourselves the same compassion and understanding that we would show to a friend in a similar situation.

While it may feel natural to be hard on ourselves when we make a mistake, this actually makes it more difficult to move forward and take care of ourselves.

When we practice self-compassion, we give ourselves permission to make mistakes and learn from them. This is one of the best ways we can show up for ourselves.

Make time for your passions

As we move through life, all too many of us lose touch with the things we’re most passionate about. Responsibilities and obligations take over until one day, we realize that nothing in our life sparks joy.

If you’ve lost touch with your passion, try thinking about what’s brought you joy in the past. What gives you energy and enthusiasm?

Once you’ve identified something that brings you joy, commit to making time to explore it more deeply. This can be a fantastic way to show up for yourself and bring joy and fulfillment back into your life.

Listen to your intuition and get clear on your goals

Getting clear on my goals in life was one of the most important aspects of learning to show up for myself.

There was a big difference between what I thought my goals should be and what goals were authentic to me.

When I wasn’t showing up for myself, I thought my goal was to get a permanent position and stay in it for years. After all, isn’t that what every dietitian should want?

But deep down, that wasn’t what I really wanted.

What I really wanted was to live a life I didn’t need to escape from. A life that allowed me to follow my passions. A life that allowed me to feel fulfilled without feeling trapped.

By listening to my intuition and getting clear on what my goals actually were, I was able to see that I needed to leave behind my goal of working in a traditional dietitian role and instead pursue my passion of writing.

I will say that the ability I had to leave a job that made me miserable was incredibly privileged. I recognize that for many folks, leaving a toxic job simply isn’t an option. For those people, I hope you’re able to show up for yourself in other ways so that you can take care of yourself, even in a situation you might not be able to leave.

Final Thoughts

Showing up for yourself on a daily basis can be a radical act of self-care.

So many of us spend our lives putting other people first and abandoning ourselves in the process.

At the end of the day, showing up for yourself is about cultivating the most important relationship you’ll ever have – the one you have with yourself. If you’re looking for self-care ideas to help show up for yourself, check out my Self-Care Workbook. In it, you’ll find journaling prompts, affirmations, coloring pages, and more!

How do you show up for yourself? Let me know in the comments below!