How to Support Someone with Mental Illness
CW: mental illness, suicide
October 10th was World Mental Health Day, and now more than ever, we need to be having conversations about supporting people living with mental illness. While it can be scary to have a loved one diagnosed with a mental illness, it’s important to know how to support them when they’re struggling. I write this article as someone who has lived with mental illness for my whole life. I feel lucky that I have an incredible support system, but not everyone does. I hope this article provides guidance that allows you to be there for your loved ones when they need you most.
Please note, I am NOT a mental health professional, and this information should not be used for diagnostic purposes. I am simply sharing things that people have done for me that have shown me they support me during difficult times. If you are struggling with mental illness, please refer to the links at the end of the article for further resources.
How do I know when to help?
One of the most challenging things about mental illness is that their symptoms can be hard to recognize if you don’t know what to look for. Some signs that your loved one may be struggling include:
- They’ve lost interest in hobbies or activities they used to enjoy
- They seem sad or angry for no reason
- They seem emotionally numb
- Their eating patterns have changed
- Their sleep patterns have changed
- They seem to be anxious about situations that seem normal to you and others
- They’ve been missing time from work or school
- They’ve been drinking heavily or using drugs to cope
- They’ve started avoiding friends or family
- They’re talking about ending their life
An important thing to note is that often, people living with mental illness become very good at hiding their symptoms. For this reason, it’s important to develop an open dialogue in which you can discuss the state of their mental health, free from judgement. Periodically checking in to see how they’re doing is one way to show that you care about their wellbeing.
How can I help?
Many people living with mental illness find it difficult to ask for help. Here are some things that people have done for me that have helped me through the difficult times.
1. Encourage them to seek professional help. Families and friends can be important advocates to help loved ones connect with the help they deserve. Helping them find a therapist in their area or offering to pay for their first appointment (if this is financially feasible for you) are ways that you can show support when a loved one is struggling.
2. Helping with medications, appointments, and treatments. If medication is a part of your loved ones’ treatment, helping them remember to take it or picking it up from the pharmacy for them can be helpful. Encouraging them to do their therapy “homework” and helping them get to their appointments can also be a way of showing your support.
3. Bringing them food or groceries. For many people, feeding themselves while they’re struggling with their mental health can be one of the most challenging things to do. I know that when I’m feeling down, the last thing I want to do is figure out what to eat and then cook it. If you’re able, bringing them a home-cooked meal or even ordering take-out for them can be a way to ensure they’re getting the nutrition they need.
4. Provide emotional support. Sometimes, we just need someone to listen. Try to be as supportive, understanding and patient as possible. Don’t forget that when you’re caring for someone living with mental illness, you need emotional support as well. Consider joining a support group for family or friends of people with mental illness so that you can connect with other people going through the same things as you.
Mental health resources
While this list is not exhaustive, here are some resources available if you or a loved one is struggling with their mental health:
Canada Suicide Prevention Service: 1-833-456-4566
Hope for Wellness Help Line: 1-855-242-3310. Available to all Indigenous peoples across Canada who need immediate crisis intervention.
Brite Line: 1-844-702-7483. Brite Line aims to create a safe space where 2SLGBTQIA+ community can connect with support free of judgement or stigma.
Wellness Together Canada (https://wellnesstogether.ca/en-CA) can help connect you with the right support.
If you’re struggling with mental illness, please feel free to share this article with friends and family so that they know how they can support you. If your loved one is struggling with mental illness, I hope this article has given you some ideas for how you can show your support.
